Burlesque Womens Institute

KatyKamikaze · Joined: 25 Feb 2008 Posts: 160 Location: Northeast

This is gonna sound incredibly sad.. but i've sort of had a revelation that all through uni i just 'knew' people because i had to.. and that i don't really have a great deal of friends who i have a lot in common with.

Anyone else ever experienced a moment of clarity like this?

Dont get me wrong, im no loner.. but i do struggle to find mates who actually 'get' me in terms of genral likes/ things in common.

lol well i know what i mean at least!

haha

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xxx Katy Kamikaze xxx

CrimbleFairy · Joined: 30 Nov 2007 Posts: 1175 Location: Leeds

I think I know what you mean hun. It's kind of like you're friends because you see each other all the time so it feels like you should be. xxx

Miss Vincent · Joined: 12 Dec 2007 Posts: 78 Location: Brighton

I was feeling a little like that too quite recently. But then I thought about it a bit more, and realised that that's how we make friends....

When I was younger, i.e. in high school, I had an amazing best friend, we had everything in common, liked the exact same things like music clothes lads etc, thought the same way. We were just different enough not to get bored of each other though. After a while, as you do, we started to grow up, change, and grow apart.

I was a bit down a little while ago, thinking I'll never have that again with another person. ANd it's probably true. But then I realised that that's absolutely normal! I mean, I have loads of different interests, so does everyone else, and it'd be so hard to find someone that's into the exact same things as you are!

You meet people through common factors, such as uni, or t'interweb, or even just on a night out. You must share at least some interests with your friends, or you wouldn't be friends! Focus on what you do have in common, not what you don't! Variety is the spice of life, anyway!

I realised that I was doing my friends a great injustice by feeling the way I did, being disappointed that they weren't the 'perfect' friend for me. They're great people (that's why their my friends!) and despite our differences, we care loads about each other, and that's what's important, being able to enjoy the time you do spend together, even if you can't do everything together, or if they think you a bit crazy for not being into 'this', or don't get why you love 'that' so much.

Hope this helps.

xxx

KatyKamikaze · Joined: 25 Feb 2008 Posts: 160 Location: Northeast

It does help!!

i didnt wanna sound ungrateful for the friends i have, but i think after uni i noticed the people who didnt make an effort to keep in touch or keep hanging out and it surprised me reallly, just made me reralise id beliving in this uni bubble and that i kinda dont know anyone in the same scenes as me.. if ya get me!

xx

i have my emo moment sometimes lol

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xxx Katy Kamikaze xxx