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Acacia Sweet

Plus One?

Dear Auntie Bettie

I'm struggling terribly with my wedding guest list. Would it be terribly rude of me not to include plus ones for everyone? Especially when I haven't met them or don't even know if they exist? I don't wish to be rude but I'm struggling to stay in budget. What is the polite way to handle this?
Violet Ecstasy

We didn't have plus one for everyone. I had a guest list of 48 for the day (for the wedding breakfast)  I didn't invited partners of friends & family if I didn't know them, I didn't even invite all my cousins or aunts & uncles (I have over 20 cousins alone!) I only invited the family I'd been close to.

My Nan moaned that she didn't know very many people, but there more of my side of the family than anyone else! You'll never please everyone but its YOUR day so do it your way!  Smile
Herr Geist

Seriously, it's your wedding day. Do it your way. If anyone has a problem with that, tell them they don't have to invite you when their fairy tale comes true. If they still act pissy, punch them in the neck. Very Happy
Thrilby

I second that HG.
Acacia it is your day, invite those you know and want there.  I am sure people will understand, especially in the current economic climate.

x
LililaScala

We are making the rule that there are no + 1's. It is your day after all, so you should have what you want.

Nothing worse than looking back at wedding photos in years to come and wondering who the random person standing at the side is, because they have long since split up with the person they came with!
Acacia Sweet

I love you guys. I've revised the guest list at least ten times already. I'm paranoid everyone is going to think I'm arrogant and ill mannered. I'm starting to have nightmares (and yes, literally, nightmares and waking up in a panic) when I start thinking about table plans. Bloody awkward relatives. Still, feeling very excited as I've just picked up a couple of lovely shawls for my grown up bridesmaids today in the sales, plus have found out the bridesmaid dresses I couldn't afford are now at half price. Also, for my two younger bridesmaids have found some beautiful dresses on ebay. (I have five bridesmaids. Family politics. Love it).
lushem

i only had 45 to my wedding itself, due to venue size, so we had to make a decision on who we wanted, and it came down to those that were really part of our lives and had been there for us,

tone's best mate had just got a new girlfriend, but she was only invited to the reception, because we hardly knew her, i didnt invite my dads parents to the wedding itself because neither of them actually played a part in my childhood!!!

i had more people to the reception (over 300) have huge extended family, but we put a little note in the invites explaining the ceremony was small and intimate and thats why the reception needed to be WILD!

I had 9 bridesmaids, and spent less than 5 grand, most of it on food!!!
Miss Baby Bones

you're very sweet to even worry about it!

make the plus ones bring a packed lunch

xxx
Acacia Sweet

Have come up with a sensible rule. Plus ones are not allowed unless a guest doesn't know anyone else/is travelling along way alone otherwise. That rules out most of them. Guest list is now very nearly finalised (subject to final approval by mother-in-law to be).

Lushem, I'm super impressed at your budgeting skills. Seriously.  Very Happy

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